When exam anxiety rises, the difficulty is rarely only the questions on the paper. The whole occasion can arrive at once: the room, the clock, the sense of being judged, memories of previous results, worries about disappointing someone, and the frightening thought...
The Archive
Can You Break an Exam into Smaller Chunks When You Feel Anxious?
What If I Cannot Explain What I Feel?
A common worry about starting therapy is that you will be expected to sit down and say exactly what is wrong in articulate, emotional language. For some people, this is already manageable. They can describe feeling low, anxious, angry, or ashamed with reasonable...
What If Eye Contact Feels Too Intense?
Often eye contact is treated as a sign of attention, respect and honesty. Therapists are often trained to use it as a way of communicating presence. Yet for many people, direct eye contact does not feel neutral. It can feel intrusive, exposing, overstimulating, or...
Is My Problem Serious Enough for Therapy?
A common barrier to starting therapy is the thought: “Other people have it worse.” You may look at your life and decide that your distress is not dramatic enough, not traumatic enough, or not unusual enough to justify seeking help. This thought can be surprisingly...
When Anger Is Trying to Protect Something Tender
Anger is often spoken about as if it is mainly a difficulty to be managed. We hear about anger management, anger issues, angry outbursts, angry people. Of course anger can become harmful. It can be used to intimidate, control, punish or avoid responsibility. When...
Polyamory in the Therapeutic Space
Holding Multiple Realities A client sits across from you and says, almost in passing, “my partners and I have been talking about…” She does not pause at the plural. She does not look up to check your face. The sentence just continues, because for her this is simply...
Concerns About Gabor Maté’s Teachings Among People with ADHD
Gabor Maté continues to have a strong influence on trauma-informed psychotherapy. His work on addiction, attachment, trauma, stress, and emotional development has resonated deeply with many people seeking alternatives to purely biomedical explanations of psychological...
Experimentation in the Therapy Room within the Integrative Modality
Experimentation in the Therapy Room within the Integrative Modality Introduction In psychotherapy, experimentation means creating small, contained opportunities for new experience within the therapeutic relationship. For therapists working integratively—drawing...
Recognising Selfobject Dynamics in the Consulting Room
Selfobject dynamics are present in every therapeutic relationship, whether explicitly recognised or not. From a self psychological perspective, clients do not merely relate to the therapist; they experience the therapist as performing essential psychological...